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Something has malfunctioned and the picture of me in the pink wig is just appearing on all of my posts!

thehobodad:

For as much as they tell you about Stop Drop and Roll as a kid, I really expected to be on fire more times in my life.

i-think-we-should-sex:

i-think-we-should-sex:

I’m trying to write but all I have so far is:

“I was awoken by the familiar scent of weed being blown into my face. Not my favourite way to be blown awake, but a close second.”

This is getting notes faster than anything I’ve ever written. 

“I named my cock ‘the truth’ cuz bitches can’t handle it.”

“DAT NIGGA just viewed your profile”